Being fat in society

Now don't get me wrong, I don't expect society to adapt to my largeness, so don't start sending me letters, but it does make for some hilarious and awkward situations:

Public Bathrooms: Think about how small your average public bathroom stall is, talk about fat man drama. The average stall has a door that opens into the stall, so in order for me to close said door I have to straddle the toilet like a porcelain pony...Laugh, please, cause its hilarious! So once the door is closed I have to deal with sitting down. Now most people probably use one of those paper ass gaskets, but this just doesn't work for me, with all the fat rolls and crevasses on my rear, when I stand back up I'd look like a broken pinata...no beuno. So with all that I still have to deal with the toilet paper roll jabbing me in the side, its like being trapped in a smelly box.

Buffet Restaurants: "You have to pay double, you too fat for one person!" Or "You go now! You been here four hours, we have no more food!" False advertisement...

Fast Food: So how messed up is it that I feel embarrassed to order something half healthy from a fast food place, imaging the employees laughing about it "Yeah like that's for him." Or they wait for me to continue to order more "Yeah I'm sure that's all I want." Its like they aren't comfortable unless I order 6 cheeseburgers over a salad. This morning I went to Dunkin' Donuts and they have a great breakfast sandwich; egg whites, Turkey sausage, spinach, low calorie mozzarella on flat bread. Its like eating rubber on cardboard, but its good. I also wanted a coffee with just Splenda, nothing else, had to have an argument about the cream that he ended up putting in there anyway!

Children: "Mommy is that a boy or a girl?" I guess it can be confusing when I have bigger breasts than their mother.